She bites her lips, licks her fingers, crosses her legs, restless. What to do. She’s not good at waiting. The clock slowly ticks the time away. Is it the heart or is it the mind you have to follow? She’s puzzled. The mind is working hard to destroy it all. There’s a nasty little voice taking over inside: ‘It doesn’t work, it never will, give up, walk away, let it be, leave it, find someone nice, willing, stop fooling around, get lost, cheer up, enough fish in the sea, don’t get hurt, he’s not worth it. There’s the other side the heart: beating endlessly, the stomage turning upside down, the body hot, humid, wanting, compulsively searching to be satisfied. What is wisdom?

So she dials the number, uneasy, so she sends the message to let the steam of for a while.

Someone else always takes you on the same train, the conveniant one, when do you hop off? Start changing direction? She’s making an effort. Communicating, not silently taking it for granted? It’s not so bad is it, to fall in love, if you can enjoy the feeling. Even if the guy simply doens’t want any of your affection. And, oh yes it sucks, but it feels wonderful at the same time. And it makes it worthwhile this time to reflect, To feel….

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